Some
other predictions that Nostradamus made
that are completely wrong are..
* Egg
Beaters & Silk will replace eggs
& milk by the year 2002
* The
Cubs will face the Red Sox in the 2003
World Series, finally breaking their
respected curses
* “The
Mullets” would be the number 1
rated show this year
* The
AMC Gremlin would make a huge comeback
* Scientists
would announce that to live a long healthy
life, people must eat Soylentâ
Green
* There
would be no more terrorists left in
the world after 9/11/01
* War
would be replaced with pillow fights
staged by half-naked lesbians in their
early 20s to resolve political problems
and this would run 24 hours a day on
all news networks
* Marijuana
would replace alcohol and cigarettes
as America's favorite past-time
* Crystal
Pepsi would be the #1 drink ever made
* Joey
Buttifuco would marry Amy Fisher
* North
Korea and South Korea would unite and
create Super Korea
* Saddam
Hussain and Osama Bin Laden would go
on a stand-up comedy tour
And finally….
* Tha
Mike would actually write a funny &
clever article
It was written in the book No-stradamus
that, "Nostradamus was a very lazy
guy who didn't take his abilities seriously,
so he did things half-assed, allowing
people to take his predictions and make
something out of them."
"Another not so well known fact
about Nostradamus," said Michaels
"is that he was a big meade drinker
and was pretty much a prick to everyone,
constantly. No one really liked him
and he was always trying to use his
predictions to score a ‘hummer’
from any chick who would listen."
One of Nostradamus' favorite pickup
lines were, "Hey baby, I'm Nostrudamus,
you can call me TRU, for short. I predict
that you and me will ‘knock boots’
tonight."
A hate letter written from an unknown
writer to Nostradamus said, "I
wish you would predict you're own death
soon, you smug, rotten, arrogant asshole.
No-Stradamus - Guesswork Gone Wrong,
by Anthony Michaels can be purchased
on Amazon.com for $23.99
Written
by Faux-Newz Staff Writer
Tha Mike |
