No
one felt the impact of this breakthrough
more keenly than Yule Rekorld, CEO of
the Fine Dandy Soap and Soap Related
Products Corp of the Inner Netherlands:
"What are we supposed to do in
the face of such competition?",
he said at his last, fateful press conference
last Sunday evening. He continued "The
'super gel' is the holy grail of our
industry, and P&G have beaten us
to it by at least as much as three to
four months. Other companies may be
a little closer, but it will be at LEAST
a fiscal quarter before any one else
can get their super gels to market.
And sprayable? Good god. This is a disaster
on scale with Pompeii".
Rekorld, in a surprise move, then put
a large caliber pistol to his forehead
and blew his brains out all over the
Fine Dandy press room. Fondly known
as the "Godfather of Modern Fabric
Stain Pretreaters", Mr. Rekorld
will certainly be sorely missed in his
field, but only time will tell how much
more devastating the effect of Proctor
and Gamble's new "spray-super-gel-laundry-stain
pretreater" will be on the industry,
and indeed on the world at large.
Written
by Faux-Newz Staff Writer
Tom Cox
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