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By thamike.com
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Drastic Measures Taken to Enforce Smoking Ban

SACRAMENTO, CA - A new law signed two weeks ago has had a lasting effect on several smokers in California.
 
" That cop just up and punched me in the stomach! Jesus fucking Christ, that hurt" said smoker Mel Trackle of Citrus Heights, minutes after a policewoman excercised her new "instant corporal punishment" rights on Trackle, who was stopped by police for smoking a tobacco cigarette while standing at a bus stop.
 
The new law, dubbed "Operation ButtPunch", was signed into law as one of recalled California Governor Gray Davis' last duties. The language of the law grants police broad rights when confronted with smokers who flaunt California's strict no-smoking laws.

Smoker
An Unassuming Young Smoker

" The law has been there for over five years", observed Sgt. Reggie Smathers, spokesperson for the California Law Enforcement Officers Association referring to the groundbreaking legislation of 1997 that ended smoking in enclosed spaces in the Golden State, “but no one was really paying attention. We think they will now" he finished, with a sly smile.
 
Police officers, sheriff's deputies, and CHP officers may now punch any smoker in violation once, hard in the stomach, regardless of age, disability, health, race, or any other consideration. An officer does not have to punch, however: The law allows the offender to be held down by as many as four other officers or "cooperative civilians" and urinated on  by the citing officer. The final option is to write a ticket for as much as a $240 dollar fine. An offender cannot receive any combination of these punishments for a single offense: the citing officer must choose just one. Most have chosen the first option.
 
" So many bad guys get away scott free. It's really satisfying just to be able to punch an offender in the stomach once in a while," said one officer who wished to remain anonymous.
 
The constitutionality of this law is under some scrutiny and will be reviewed by the California Supreme Court this week.

Written by Faux-Newz Staff Writer
Tom Cox


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