I realized it could only mean one thing. I have an Internet stalker. What I say is so original, no-one could come up with that on their own."

She continued, "I can't go anywhere I used to now because I know this stalker is out there, reading my every word, knowing my inner most thoughts, probably spanking it to just the thought of my name, it's terrible."

Most internet experts agree that while there may be some cases of internet stalkers, it is not a big deal like scores of female internet users are claiming.

"The ladies stating these claims have to realize that if you put it on the net, everyone can read it, so by means, if a female posts on fark.com then to her, everyone on that site is a stalker", said 34 year old self proclaimed internet expert Spencer McGee.

"I go to a lot of forums, blogs, chat rooms, message boards, et cetera. I don't post but I do enjoy reading. That doesn't make me a stalker, I just think these women are either idiots or searching for attention. Either way, I don't think woman should be on the net unless it is pictures of them naked, offering free cyber sex or running a no charge all nude all the time web cam. I mean really, what more could women offer?" finished, McGee.

It should come as no surprise that McGee is single and still living at home with his parents.

Only time will tell if the Internet stalker claims are true. Until then, just for the love of god be careful what you write on the net.

Written by Faux-Newz Staff Writer
Tha Mike