WASHINGTON
D.C. - President
Bush came out against the reportedly
rigged presidential election
in the Ukraine. Recent reports
in that country claim that Prime
Minister Viktor Yanukovich used
foul play in order to steal
the election from opposition
leader Viktor Yushchenko. President
Bush stated that the poorly-rigged
election was an egregious crime
against democracy.
He
said, "If yer gonna' steal
an election, do it right! Don't
leave yer fingerprints all over
the scene of the crime. I've
got two words for someone who
wants to stuff the ol' ballot
box – ‘touch screen.'
Touch-screen voting is the way
to go. I mean, look at the debacle
in the 2000 election because
I had to steal it the ol' fashion
way, with those damn punch cards.
See how much easier it was in
my election this year? There's
not even a paper trail for God's
sake!"
Written
by Faux-Newz Staff Writer
Lee Camp