|5. Car bombs. Get a
new gig, already. Car bombs are soooo
6. I thank God, every day, that Martha
Stewart is safely behind bars and unable
to force those horrible drapery and cranberry
vinaigrette tips down my precious throat.
7. Look guys, Dr. Phil is a big fat bastard.
He will not be able to council you on
weight loss, healthy eating, or scoring
lingerie models. This is just the way
8. Where are Saddam and Robert Blake?
9. Abstinence is the way! What the hell
happened to the early ë90s? Where did
all that education go? Now we're back
on breeding terms. Great. More of them.
10. I wonder what North Korea's up to
by Faux-Newz Staff Writer