Faux-Newz
Now...
More Than Ever Before.
By thamike.com
C1
Headline

P. Diddy Kills 27th Non-Voter In Second Week

The infamous rapper P.Diddy, nee Sean J. Combs, has brutally executed his 27th victim in his ongoing “Vote or Die” campaign. His newest kill, Mr. Jonathan Baker, 20 of Portland, Oregon, was found lying face down in a pool of blood on the couch in his tiny basement apartment. He had a single gunshot wound to the head. A note with the words “Undecided 2004” scrawled on it was thumb tacked to his back, apparently done after he was dead...

Penis
Full Story

Peterson Case Bad News For Murderous Adulterers

The recent verdict to convict Scott Peterson for the murder of his wife Laci and their unborn son Conner has struck a mighty blow to the cause of murderous adulterers, according to sources Monday. The National Brotherhood of Murderous Husbands Who Cheat as Well (N.B.M.H.)is convening in Fresno to show support for Peterson during his sentencing phase."...

Penis
Full Story

Bush Win Bad For Country, Good For Satire

With the recent re-election of George W. Bush to the presidency, most Americans feel duped into an era which promises nothing good for America. Nothing good, except perhaps for the nation's satirists." We're thrilled by it, of course," Marston Giesel of Satire Incorporated (the largest satire-based company to be traded on Nasdaq) said in a phone interview Monday. "Sure, it's lousy for the rest of the country, but for out clients it means they won't have to go hungry for a while longer....

Penis
Full Story

Election Anxiety And How To Deal
With It - By: Dr. Russell Paika

This political season was harrowing, to say the least, and I’m sure many of you, whether totalitarian ignoramus mud-sluts or pandering namby-pamby pussy-faced idgits, are looking for some relief...

Full Story

Russell Paika’s
Thanksgiving Tips!

Howdy! Happy Thanksgiving! It may be a bit early, but how would you be able to prepare your delectable holiday feast without the wisdom of your ever-trustworthy Professor Paika?...

Full Story

O'Reilly Calls Out King For Bare-Knuckle Boxing

The Right To Bare Arms... And Everything Else

Republicans Take Over Country, Dictionary

Evidence Mounting: Rome Was Built In A Day!

Boston Win Forces Re-evaluation Of Religions

Geraldo / Gerardo Merger Falls

Poll
Other Stuff
Fat Chance
Gregory
CCC
Fat Chance
This Weeks Faux Sponsor
Taco Shit Barbie - Click Here!

Newz For The Weeks Of
11/15/04 - 11/28/04

Issue # 38

Send To A Friend
Newz Briefs
Penis
Dick Rubs Head In Public
NKOTB
Coming Soon, The New Kids
On The Block Reunion Tour
Faeg
Gay Man, Considers Extreme
Sex Change Tuesday
Red Dead
Gay Man, Regrets Extreme
Sex Change Wednesday
The Satire Awards
Faux Newz
Link To Us
Faux-Newz.com

What People Are Saying About Faux-Newz...

I wait all weeks for an update and the day before the election you give me recycled stories from
previous issues... What the fuck is wrong with you people? Charma Suitra, via e-mail

I recently read your article on "How To Kill Someone" I must admit I was intreaged, but to the point.
I was curious to see if you would know any sites off hand that would be able to sell me Sax Toxin,
thank you for your time and I look forward to speaking with you. A Godly, via e-mail

I see you have no fear of the one who holds the keys to death and hell. Sad to say for you
that God said anyone who mocks Him...He in like manner will mock you at The Great White Throne
Judgement. Can you imagine being on your knees asking for another chance as you are laughed at by
your creator as he says, "Depart from me ye.....I never knew you" and then being cast into the Lake of
Fire for eternity with no rest and unimaginable pain where your flesh burns
but is never consumed? Bartus Maximus, via e-mail

Have Something To Say? Click Here

© 2004 faux-newz.com - Fabricated News For The Less Than Holy!
Terms of Service: All trademarks and copyrights on this page are owned by their respective owners.
Text comments posted on Tha Mike may not be reposted or broadcasted without mentioning faux-newz.com as the source.
C2
   
C4 C3